Posted by: sgtsarcasm | June 23, 2011

The Adventures of Bear: Indoor Survivalist

At first it was like any old afternoon.  My mom had taken the monsters out to find another ridiculous way to entertain them, while I stayed at home arguing over which gaming system was better: PS3 or Xbox 360.  While my father was telling me some BS about the PS3 being great, I heard a loud crash down the hall leading to the room we were in.  I glanced out into the living room and saw a huge pad of chart paper on the ground.  Nothing out of the ordinary (canvases and poster boards are always falling in our house).  So I go back into my parent’s room to continue my conversation.  About five minutes later, I see Tigerlily chasing what I at first thought was a lizard, with Mittens (her new apprentice) following close behind.  I went closer to discover she was actually chasing Tess’ new hamster, Bear.  Within seconds she was trotting around the house with Bear’s hind legs sticking out of her mouth.  “JESUS CHRIST!!” I exclaimed as I grabbed her, trying to make her spit out the rodent.  She eventually set Bear, who was surprisingly still in mint condition, free, and it scurried into my siblings’ room while my dad chucked the huntress out the door.  Bear’s cage was on the ground, the top broken off and bedding all around it.  I quickly caught Bear, put him in his cage and locked him away in my room.  Afterward as I played Xbox, I thought about the ways a hamster could commit suicide.

I still haven’t been paid for saving that soon-to-be can of Fancy Feast.Bears' namesake: Bear Grylls

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Responses

  1. next time….get the camera.

    love the post- writing is brilliant.

  2. Excellent writing #1 Son! You tell it funnier than your mom!

  3. “JESUS CHRIST!!” I exclaimed as I grabbed her, trying to make her spit out the rodent.

    That was actually Me that tapped on Tiger Lilly’s back in order for her to cough up the poor little hamster, you just stared at the cat in shock. You did pick up and save Bear. The PS3 is a better system!

    Nice post good job :)

    PS3 #1

    The Azorian

  4. [...] But at least I got my kid to write something. [...]


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